So I just wanted to explain to everyone who follows me on tumblr, deviantart and facebook as to why I've been so absent as of late and tell you all about my journey of self discovery.

As it says in my info section I am a college student. I graduated high school three years ago and it's taken me all that this time to figure out what I want as a career. First I thought it was music, so I spent my first semester and a half as a music performance major. Then when I came back to school after Katsucon in 2011 I realized I had more fun that weekend and felt like I belonged at conventions more than I did in school. So I left my college and went home. Then I started working full time and starting to go to a community college closer to home and just tried to take gen ed classes to figure out what to do but didn't have a clue. Without a goal in mind it's hard to gather motivation so I continued to fail my classes. Then in March of last year I thought I would become a social worker. I had been in a few abusive relationships and I wanted to help others, but as the months passed from summer to fall and I watched my family get in more and more fights I realized how can I help others when I can't even help myself. I became lost and confused and once again no clue what to do in life.

I registered for one class in the fall and dropped out in a month and spent all my time working so I could continue to goof off and dress up and have fun at conventions. Trying to find a career was so stressful and confusing so I thought maybe I would find my answer while having some fun doing something I really enjoy. So with the support of my boyfriend I worked hard, played hard and visited him every now and then. I just accepted that I would have to work at stupid part time jobs for the next ten years because I was going to be a late bloomer.

January came and I found that the continuing education program at my college was doing a fashion design program. I always liked dressing up and looking my best even before I cosplayed so much. If you look in my closet you'd see I'm very stylish. But designing clothes? I wouldn't be good at that. Then someone told me fashion design doesn't necessarily mean you want to design clothes, I could do costumes and stuff as well. Great! Where do I sign up? And that's what I've been doing for two months. And I've actually been doing well! I was motivated and stayed on track and if we were graded I'm sure I would get a B!

For my first two and a half years in college I didn't have the right motivation. College is very different than high school. If you aren't going to college to further yourself but to please someone else like your parents or trying to prove your parents wrong, you will not succeed. College is all about YOU. You need to be self motivated to give yourself the career you want. You almost have to be selfish. I'M doing THIS for ME! So that's what I've been doing, I work at my job and then I work in school and I haven't had much spare time in between. I want to have a career in sewing and making costumes not just for me but others. That;s why I'm open for commissions. That's why I'm into cosplaying. That's why I'm in a fashion design program. And that's why I haven't made many updates lately. And I feel bad for missing out on my friend's lives and not entertaining you all as much as I normally do but I will be back soon. April is going to be super busy for me because I'll be starting my next class while finishing up my first one and taking on more hours at work because my coworker is going on maternity leave.

I'm telling you all this because many people who follow me here on the interwebs see me as a cosplayer, which I am, but I'm also just a 21 year old girl trying to pay her way through college. And even I need to remember that. I work a lot to pay for school and car insurance, and whatever is left goes to cosplaying. I have almost nothing saved. That's why I was going to start selling prints but I just can't do it. If I'm going to ask for money I'd rather sell you something like a Nia, Stocking or Twilight Sparkle wig that I made.

I'll still post things when I get the chance but I just want to explain and apologize for my being so quiet and how quiet I'll be for a month. I love you all and thank you for your continued support while I continue my journey. Once April is over you'll start to see more progress pictures again. I'll be redoing my Wonder Woman costume, make two versions of Supergirl, maybe Livewire, and then Yuri from Mawaru Penguindrum and Saria from Legend of Zelda. And Lucy from Elfen Lied. I chose these characters because I already have everything I need to make them so I won't need to spend much money on new materials. And then I can save up money for the bigger cosplays I have planned like Musubi, Nia's wedding dress and Twilight Princess Zelda.